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Friday, November 11, 2022

Common relationship problems - ITREALMS

HeartsJourney@ITREALMS ... making leadership SENSE with digital news!

Every relationship has its issues but with maturity and understanding you can overcome them. Some problems may be unbearable and intolerable while some can be overlooked. It all depends on each individual’s perception.

Heart's Journey with Ishioma Onah

I will do my best to explain some of the common relationship problems and possible solutions to getting them fixed.

1. Sex is not existing again.

Being together with someone for a while can easily make you both take each other for granted. After a while you may both start operating routine sex, or have a timetable for sex. Which is not good at all? Though it is natural for things to die down after the initial excitement of the first love or intoxicating feelings that come with hormones, after some weeks, months or years the libido gradually goes down, so an extra effort needs to be made to spice things up


ACTION POINT: Making yourself horny about your partner is possible, it is not an impossible thing after all something attracted you to that person in the first place. Ensure you have the correct proximity, thought and attitude with an open mind and maybe a little fantasy (if that’s your thing) you can spice things up again.  It would not be a bad idea if you can consider things like visiting a hotel together, go out on a date night, club, beach, send sms to each other, sex text your partner, send sexy pictures, lure each other again. Don’t perform lip service, if you love them get up and show them.

2. Spending too much time away from each other

Everyone has their own individual capacity for tolerance. So decide between each other what is enough time or too much time. But the truth is if you do not spend quality time together, it may be difficult to face any storm together. Out of sight is out of mind.

Action point: Both of you need to decide how busy about your life you intend to be, there will always be an excuse for work, career, kids, family, and other obligations. The simple trick is to plan. Arrange dates ahead of time to give each other time to plan their schedules. 

Research about places that will make them comfortable or happy. With the help of social media and technology it is easy to keep your love alive. Take action.

3. Feeling of insecurity.

In relationships you have to be on the same page. You can’t be planning or saying one thing while your partner is on another planet. You must synchronize with each other. If you want a big career, they may just want a quiet life. Whatever you do must not affect them negatively so as not to cause insecurity.

Action point: We all know that one cannot have everything in life.  In Life opportunities come and go. Some will be gotten some will be missed. Don’t let it get to point of no return before you and your partner decide on what you consider as important. You don’t have to sacrifice your dreams, but there should be away to work it out so that you both clearly understand what is expected of each other. Because you both deserve to be happy

 

4. You both don’t like each other’s parents

That is a normal thing, it is not compulsory to like or love, but you should at least tolerate, it’s a tough one but you need to try. The truth is your spouse may not like their own parent too, but you need to show them some respect. They didn’t decide who their parents will be and neither did you. 

Action points: Consideration is key; everyone deserves to be considered in a positive way.   Your partners mum may not be an angel (it’s always the mums right?, tell me about it!! Or your partner’s dad behaves like Ebenezer scrooge whichever the case may be you need to apply wisdom. You have to look past some of these and look at the big picture. However, if they are mean and unfriendly you are not obliged to become pals or best friends but the point is respect as a when due.  

5. Lack of tolerance to partners problem.

This happens a lot because life cannot be rosy all the time, we face good patches we face bad patches, for several reasons anything can happen, from change in career, relocation, economic meltdown. Just ensure to be tolerant so you understand how the person is feeling.

Action point: There’s If you do not understand how the other person is feeling then it may be hard not impossible but hard. There is truly no easy solution, sit down in patience help them to open up in peace to you. It can be a difficult process, time consuming and exhausting if you are not getting the point. If you cannot offer advise at least a positive give them a listening ear and maybe a shoulder to cry on, sometimes silence is golden. People have different pressure thresholds don’t be the irate or absent partner, be the patient one. Simple words like “I am here for you” can do the trick.

6.Lack of Attention.

We all love attention, it’s a human thing, but you also need to pay attention to your spouse and every detail counts. Some people don’t have self-love, which can be disastrous as it affects self-confidence and generates inferiority complex in some cases. You should not have a relationship solely you want someone to Love you when you can’t love yourself. You are just as important as anyone else.

Action point: Communication is important. If it is too much then get a counselor to assist. If you want to keep things simple, think about what you can do to make your partner feel good and open enough to share your feelings with each other.

7. Intolerance to sexual preferences.

Is your partner too kinky? Always asking for sex? Are they too horny? Or too kinky? Do they simply like some stuff you’re not okay with, or is it more than that? Do you feel obliged to deliver their fantasies or are they being disrespectful?

Action point: Once you determine the root of the issue, sit back and tell your partner what you like in bed and, kindly, what you’re not really up for. Intercourse doesn’t have to be boring, but it sure does have to be consensual and respectful.

8. You both dislike each other’s friends

In life there will always be people who will not like you and same for you not to like everyone you meet. A lot of times and those people might turn out to be your partner’s buddies. There might be something small, but unbearable, such as the way they talk, brag, or gossip about others. There might be something big, like the way they look at you or the way they try to influence your partner into getting back with their ex-pals.

Action point: This doesn’t mean they have to cut the chord with their friends or choose between you and them. If you simply don’t get along with their friends, you don’t have to push yourself over the edge. Let your spouse meet their friends separately and do something for yourself instead, so that everyone enjoys their own experiences fully. I wish you all the best!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

This is awesome. Keep it up Ishioma. We love you. Keep progressing